Yes folks, this gnome is back on patrol. I’ve been on expedition for a while for those damn Travelocity folks but I’m back to my true passion of Clemson Athletics and the responsibilities owed to reporting on them. I will say, I-85 is a beotch and needs some work, okay, a lot of work.

First and foremost, this weekend’s game. The gnomes will be heavily represented in the motherland this weekend with a bachelor party for a gnome friend and one gnome’s wedding plans in the area. Chief contributor Broken won’t be with us but hopefully can cheer on the women’s tennis as they visit his neck of the woods.

For those traveling in for the annual spring exhibition and hopefully a little golf, here is what you have in store:

Friday afternoon - high of roughly 72 with a fair amount of clouds. Friday evening will bring increasing cloudiness and a ceiling to hold in some of the spring warmth. Lows in the mid to upper forties. Have a jacket handy though; there will be a cool breeze out of the northeast.

Saturday should taunt us a little. Highs should hit about 70 for those at the O&W game. If you plan on getting a late round of golf in or watch the former players in a little flag football action, have a pullover handy; you are most likely getting a little wet. Know your shelter locations if you are on the golf course, thunder and lighting will most likely be present (and I’m not talking and James and CJ being on the course with you). Don’t let the clouds and breeze fool you. If you have winter pastiness going on, pack your sunscreen. That shadow under your cap at noon means you are getting sun. If you are like me, you’ll be glowing fox bait by the end of the game if you aren’t careful.

Expect a wet rest of the weekend as storms are expected to roll through for the night and on through Sunday with a low in the mid 50’s and little to no warming on Sunday as the winds pull in behind the front. Look for a friendly garage and beer pong game in true prep (reverse order of course) for the tailgating season that is only a few months away.

As for other sports this weekend here ya go. Women’s Tennis: Don’t plan on seeing anything that way unless it’s scheduled inside. You’ll have rain and strong storms pretty much all weekend, starting in the near future if not already. From the pics I’ve seen though, any indoor action could prove to be quite steamy. Dress accordingly.

Baseball at Wake- Hope you have a refund opportunity for that Sunday ticket. Expect the Saturday game to get started but odds are 50/50 they get cut short.

As for the hippies on campus, the hell with um. I thought those folks were typically against additional legislation but this crap doesn’t surprise me. I’ll be sure to honk the horn of my gas guzzling SUV as I pass their rally on the way to the game. We have architects, language majors, and art and music classes on campus. This activity is no huge surprise; we should just be glad that no more than a hundred or so students will actually attend, and half of those are guys that just want to get in the pants of some hippie chic that is going through her experimental phase in college. With that in mind, you might have the final sighting of the former rowing coach…if you know what this gnome means.

There’s going to be a global warming rally? Well let me fire up the Suburban and get my ass down there.

A rally in Clemson Saturday will be one of hundreds across the nation aimed at raising awareness of global warming and urging that political leaders take action to curb it.

Raising awareness? Of global warming? Why I’ve never heard of it. Have any of you? What is this “global warming” of which they speak, anyway.

The goal is to focus attention on the issue and support legislation reducing the emissions of carbon dioxide into the atmosphere by 80 percent by 2050.

So the goal isn’t to convince or persuade people to reduce, over the next 46 years, their personal carbon emissions by 80%. They want government legislation to make us do it. Just peachy.

The nationwide effort is being pushed by the left-leaning MoveOn.org

Looks like I picked the wrong week to stop sniffing glue.